Tears for Love.......

Tears for Love



One moment can change the way you see, so easily
Pain comes in many dimensions
The release of that pain is what gives us that first drop
Rolling down like wind from the mountains
It drop, it falls, it is a tear for love

Like a wave in the ocean it flows
Naturally it becomes calming
Peacefully and ongoing as constant as a heartbeat
You feel it, good or bad it happens..Then joy
Joy for your tears of love

Loving the way you feel
Loving why you feel
Loving how you feel
The warmth, the relaxing the tear
It drops, it falls, it is a tear for love

Mostly it is in bad times
But sometimes in good times
You feel its presence and enjoy its comforting
These tears are for love….

Let them drop; let them fall for we know they are tears of love.


By: Ealia L. Payne
April 2, 2007

Poem I Wrote for my Grandmother Upon Her Passing 3/13/07...

When The Time Comes.....



Rejected, distressed, depressed.Alone, afraid, regrets come forward. The memories flow, the sounds and pictures fade.

The dreams you carry forwardRelevant but fading slowly. Feelings open…letting your self go. Peaceful paradise from beyond the stars. A fresh oil painting wet to touch.Eventually it dries now just a picture. Losing love, love, L.O.V.E. Communication is open, speak the last words. Mouth the last feeling “L.O.V.E U”. Can you go on living life? Frustrated you feel. Neglected you are taken for granted. ALONE…MISUNDERSTOOD…UNSURE. How can the emotions of a loss be found without speaking? Tears falling.Faces change, dreams-become vivid memories, angels are seen. Arms are raised. Joy is pain. Eyes tear-filled,non-focus attained. Worries are gone, time stands still. Pictures become fills, eternal love is granted. Time has come and life is everlasting.

In his eyes and you fly.

Ealia Payne
Copyright ©2009 Ealia Payne
03/13/07

R.I.P Grandma Babydoll

Observations


Sometime I like to sit back and people watch. Watch people as they come and as they go in their daily activities. Weather they are driving, walking, talking to their loved ones or just sitting back and smelling the roses.

The other day I made an observation as I was on my lunch break. As I was driving back from good old Chick Fil A I noticed in the car behind me a women crying. You could tell that she was fighting back tears and some tears escaped. She had children in the back of her car and they seemed oblivious to there chauffeurs turmoil. I wondered “what could she be crying about?” The nice in me, wanted to ask her if she was okay. But how could I do this when I don’t even know this woman. She seemed very perplexed over whatever was causing her such emotional distress. Maybe she heard some bad news, or maybe she feared something or someone or maybe she was tired whatever it was it seemed to bother her a lot. The whole time we sat at that red light I was drawn to looking out my rearview mirror to look at this woman. My heart screamed out to help this woman. At last the light turned green and the women whom had cried tears for the last 2 minutes, struggled to wipe her tears enough to see through them to drive. And we drive and she still seemed upset. Within 20 seconds she was no longer behind me but going in the direction of her destination for that of which I will never know.

Just an Observation, with No Meaning. Observing only to observe.

Everyday we make observations into others lives only to realize we will never know what those observations mean nor would we understand them.

Just an Observation.........

Nostalgia

Nostalgia--

1. A bittersweet longing for things, persons, or situations of the past.
2. The condition of being homesick; homesickness.

These days I find myself feeling Nostalgic. Performing Nostalgic behaviors like reaching far back into my history and wondering. Wondering what life would be like if I had made different choices and taken a different path years ago. Where would I be, who would I be with what decisions would have made things different. Nostalgia is a funny thing, because it takes you places that you don't even remember until something brings them up, a smell, a place, a look, a birthday or a person. Sometimes early in life people or things have their very own place in your memory log. That special place is sometimes connected to an emotion, and when something triggers that specific emotion then Nostalgia occurs.

This Nostalgia sometimes brings you to reach back and wonder if passing up certain opportunities would have made your life different. If you let go of something for the greater good of someone else will somehow make your life in the future better. If letting go of something you really wanted so easily, because it was the right thing to do would somehow assist you with reaping the rewards in the future. However, after some time passes you are still wondering, was it worth it? Will Nostalgia come back to haunt you over and over again and again year after year? Nostalgia mostly is just a pause button on life only for play to be pressed again and your back to your regularly scheduled program.

Nostalgia, a funny thing it is.......

What do you do....

What do you do when you realize that the person you thought you knew is not really the same person anymore?
What do you do when reality comes in to play?
What do you do when you begin questioning everything?
What do you do when those questions develop answers that you never would have thought of?
What do you do when love becomes a distant memory?
What do you do when you realize that it’s not as easy as you thought?
What do you do when fear is a relevant thought in your everyday mind?
What do you do when everything you thought you had starts to get ripped apart piece by piece?
What do you do when even though you strive to move forward the haunting memories of a past that want stay in the past keeps coming back?
What do you do when your dreams and goals are reachable but yet still so distant?
What do you do when you just don’t know anymore?
What do you do…..?

Inspiration

Inspiration

There are many people, places, and things that inspire me.

As I strive to be able to inspire myself I delve deep into how those are able to inspire others.

Whether it is the musician who plays the instrumental so well and I wonder, why can’t I.

The singer whom upon opening there mouth lets go of sounds and melodies unique to them, why can’t I.

The dancer who moves so gracefully across the floor to any beat or no beat at all, why can’t I.

The author whom can write a novel without effort and look back at a best seller, why can’t I.

The chef who can whip up a meal that would make your mother’s mouth water, why can’t I.

The entrepreneur with the million dollar idea, why can’t I.

The friend with a heart of stone, who would give you the clothes off her back, why can’t I.

The enemy whom learns to forgive without even thinking, why can’t I.

The mother whom can comfort her child without even speaking, why can’t I.

The America who has a leader who inspires all, why can’t I.

The only reason I can’t is because I think I can’t, I will when I know I will.

I can because I can and no one can tell me otherwise.

Inspiration lies within the depths of one soul and can only be brought out when you realize you can.

Change......

Picture this, a blistery cold 28 degree, windy day in the nation’s capital. American families and there children against the elements and the odds. A man set to lead a nation and then you realize “we have overcome”.

That scene sets the stage for what I experienced in this historic time in our lives. A time I did not think would happen in my lifetime. My heart and spirit was hoping it would happen and it did.

The campaign, election, and subsequent inauguration of our 44^th President of the United States have brought a sense of spirit back to America. In my opinion our country has been standing still for so long that we had become to move backwards in time. Letting the hard work of ancestors go un seen almost as if the struggles had not happen. But then we notice a man who has come to restore our belief in this great country we call the United States of America.

I believe in the spirit that has been restored in me.

I believe in the prayers that have been answered.

I believe in the true meaning of love.

I believe in me.

I believe in this nation.

I believe in our people.

I believe in our ancestors.

I believe in my neighbor.

I believe in the yet unborn children of America.

I have hope for the future.

I have hope for today.

I have hope for this country and all that I know we are capable of accomplishing.

I will do what I can to help “Renew America’s Promise”.

Will You?